How to Support a Co-worker Through a Personal Crisis - The Muse

How to Support a Co-worker Through a Personal Crisis - The MuseHow to Support a Co-worker Through a Personal Crisis When you spend over 40 hours a week with the same group of people, you cant help but form bonds. Shared experiences like laughing at office-related inside jokes, dealing with tough bosses, and frequenting favorite lunch spots can turn colleagues into partal friends. You may even come to know about your co-workers lives outside of the office. Its notlage uncommon to spend time with your co-workers at happy hours and fitness classes or know about (or even meet) their kids, spouse, and friends. But what happens then when a close colleague encounters a personal crisis? Whether a co-worker is going through a divorce, caring for a family member with an illness, or experiencing another personal problem, it can be confusing to know how to respond appropriately. While you may feel a degree of intimacy with this person and feel like its natural to inquire about the details and st ep in to try to alleviate some of the stress, there are still professional boundaries you should respect. Its wise to strike a balance between offering your support and respecting your colleagues privacy.Here are some rules of thumb to help you achieve that happy medium.Do Show Youre ApproachableEveryone wants to feel acknowledged and comforted during tough times, but it can be challenging to figure out how to convey support in an appropriate way. When you dont know what to say, something simple yet heartfelt- like, Im so sorry to hear about the loss of your mother- can be just what your co-worker needs to hear. And its absolutely OK to let your colleague know youre there for her if she does want to talk about whats going on. This doesnt, however, mean barraging her with questions or insisting on details that could drive her away. Dont Offer Unsolicited AdviceWhile its tempting to want to play amateur therapist and offer advice to your struggling co-worker- particularly if youve bee n there before- focus on supporting, not preaching. Your goal should be to make your colleague feel comfortable and cared for, not to provide your recommendations. Unless someone specifically asks for your advice, its best to keep your opinions to yourself. Instead, ask open-ended questions like, How are you holding up? to try and understand how he or she is feeling.Do Offer to Help in Specific WaysAvoid offering vague statements like, Let me know if theres anything I can do or asking, How can I help? These blanket sentiments place a burden on the struggling person to make an effort to generate ideas for you, and chances are, your colleague may feel uncomfortable requesting help from a fellow co-worker. Instead, be proactive and show youre willing to help by offering assistance in specific, concrete ways, such as, Im running out for lunch can I pick up a meal for you today? or, Im calling the distributor- do you want me to touch base with him on your behalf about the new designs? Si mple gestures like behauptung can provide a huge amount of relief for your colleague. And, by offering something specific, you wont get overloaded with tasks you dont have the bandwidth to handle or arent comfortable with based on the nature of your relationship.Dont Be Susie SunshineIf your colleague is going through a personal crisis, he doesnt need you reminding him to buck up and look on the bright side. Every person experiences lifes highs and lows differently, and its important to respect your colleagues unique coping process- whatever that entails. While you likely have good intentions, your optimism can inadvertently make it seem like youre downplaying or trivializing the matter, which can make the situation even worse for your co-worker. A better strategy is to help him or her feel heard and understood by offering phrases like, That sounds so difficult or You must be angry By validating your co-workers struggles, yet remaining neutral, youll help him feel comfortable openin g up to you. At the same time, you minimize the risk of alienating him by making him feel like hes overreacting or not handling things the way he should. Supporting a colleague whos going through personal turmoil can be a tricky workplace scenario to navigate. When you reach out to offer your support, remember to honor your co-workers boundaries and let him or her take the lead on how much he or she wants to disclose. By sticking to these rules of thumb, youll be able to strike a balance of support and respect. In the long run, this helps you preserve and strengthen your relationship with that person and foster even better teamwork when the clouds clear.Photo of comforting colleague courtesy of Shutterstock.

When to Quit Your Job and How to Get a Better One

When to Quit Your Job and How to Get a Better One When to Quit Your Job and How to Get a Better One Does your Monday start to feel more dreadful week by week? Have you lost the enthusiasm for your career that you once had? Perhaps its time to start thinking about when to quit your job and what it will take to get a better one.Experts say that the average adult changes jobs about 12 times in their lifetime. According to the US Bureau of Labor Statistics, gender, age, and life experience can play a role in this. On average men between the ages of 18-48 have held 11.8 jobs, women 11.5 jobs. Working people 18-24 years of age held an average of 5.5 jobs, but by the time workers reach age 25-39, they slow down switching jobs to about 2.1 jobs during this period.How to know when to quit your jobThere can be a number of partieal and professional factors that can influence your decision to switch careers. These can range from general dissatisfaction with the job itself to an impending move to another region. If you fall into the first category, you may be seeing signs around you that includeNo further advancement opportunities available in the job or companyPoor compensation and benefits that are below industry averagesConstant conflicts between staffers and members of the management teamBad business decisions putting the company, clients, and employees at riskToxic working conditions or co-workers that have become part of the cultureA job that no longer meets your professional goals or career growthIf you find yourself feeling overwhelming stress, anger, or disappointment in your job, by all means try to talk with your supervisor about ways to improve things before you walk away.Planning a job changeWhenever possible, plan your departure from this company ahead of time and do so with one goal in mind to find a better job and company where you can shine. From a professional standpoint, its always preferable to leave on a positive note and with plenty of notice given. Us e the following steps to get ready to find a new job and leave this one behind.Step 1 Take a good look at your current skills and how they align with your career goals.Before you can start applying for new jobs you may need some brushing up on certain skills and knowledge. For example, if you are looking to make a career leap into a management role, there are some free and low cost leadership development programs you can get involved in. Consider online classes and after-work groups that enable you to maintain your current job while you work on improving your skills - something that todays employers like to see on a resume.Step 2 Evaluate the current resume and cover letter you are sending to employers.It can be easy to get stuck in a rut by using the same old resume and cover letter, but things have changed a lot since your last job search. Employers are no longer interested in reading through a long detailed resume. Many no longer require much more than a brief emaille introduc tion or a link to a social media profile in lieu of a cover letter. Take the time to get your resume scanned and reviewed to make sure you know what areas to improve. Create a short-form cover letter and customize it to each job you apply to (no form letters).Step 3 Meet with a certified career coaching professional.A job change is not something to look at lightly. This can have a major impact in yourself, your spouse or partners, kids, and even friends and other family members. Its important to understand how to handle things with tact, from searching for jobs to arranging for interviews around work time. A career coach can help you establish clear career goals, focus on the right career opportunities, and make the transition more smooth. An added bonus many career coaches have connections and can refer you to hiring companies.Step 4 Improve your brand image, and your confidence.Before stepping outside into the world of job seekers, take an inventory of your current image. How up to date are your social media profiles? Is your LinkedIn profile optimized?We know that around 70% of employers routinely check out the social media profiles of candidates before calling them in for an interview. Yours needs a professional photo, a good overview of your skills, written references from past and current colleagues, and some featured content that shows off your achievements. Clean up anything else. Do the same with the way you present yourself in person get a haircut and get some new clothes for interviews and networking opportunities.Step 5 Understand the current job market.How people apply for jobs and how employers seek out candidates are continually evolving. The current job market favors job seekers, mostly due to shortages of skills in many core areas and industries. Soft skills are critically important, but so are technical, analytical, and project-focused abilities. How well does your resume reflect these areas? Use a resume scanning service to get matched to targeted jobs and companies that should be on your radar. Evaluate how well you are matching with desired jobs so you can get better results.The above steps are just a few ways you can start getting ready to leave your current job and move into a new one. Take your time and leave your old job behind when the right job offer arrives.

How to Communicate Effectively as a Manager

How to Communicate Effectively as a ManagerHow to Communicate Effectively as a ManagerHow to Communicate Effectively as a Manager Alain, author of The Managers Phrase Book (Career Press, 2013)You are a respected professional with more than enough expertise to succeed in your field. But sooner or later, you must communicate effectively with others that are either your peers or your subordinates.Communication skills become even more critical if you youve been in your chosen profession for a long period of time and have risen into a management position. By that time, youve encountered a wealth of information that you were never formally taught.You will need to communicate to push projects forward, but the tools for workplacecommunication have changed. Email has virtually wiped out the memo, the fax, and the letter. Social media has added a layer of communication that is extremely nuanced and very difficult to control.A Failure to CommunicateWhat are the consequences of failing to commun icate well?Your clients or project needs may not be met.Your subordinates may be confused about what is expected of them.Your goals may come crashing down around your head, and the collective heads of your superiors, peers, and staffers.Not a pretty picture by any means.Lets face it effective communication is not easy. Nearly all professions suffer from some form of communication problem. A recent survey documented that 70% of respondents said they didnt understand their accountant (not surprising, really), and a staggering 97% said the saatkorn thing about computer experts.Some of this miscommunication can be blamed on the fact that accountants and computer specialists use a wide slate of terminology and jargon.Is your profession any different? Can you sleep at night, knowing that the same percentage of people might not understand what you consider critical information from where you sit? Is it any easier to drop off knowing that, whenever you are passing information to another per son or group, you are doing so precisely because that information is new to them, no matter what their industry.The keys to effective communication are simple and directSpeak clearly and briefly. Dont fluff up your speech with flowery phrases or empty anecdotes. Pare down your words to the essentials and let the power of your simple phrases do the heavy lifting for you.Back up your ideas with knowledge. Stick to the facts. A little research goes a long way to proving your point and winning over your audience. If you are an expert in your field, introduce yourself with pithy information about your background and then swiftly segue into the meat of your presentation.Speak positively. Avoid negativism, talking down to your audience, or badmouthing others in your profession (no matter how much you may think they deserve it). Ultimately taking the high road will win you plaudits quickly and effectively.Think before you speak. Using notes is acceptable in fruchtwein speaking occasions, bu t even with practice it is possible to depart from the script. If doing so, avoid vapid extemporaneous bridges to nowhere. You usually wont be able to find your way back, or to recapture your audiences attention.Finish each thought before moving on. This seems to not need an explanation, but if you arent your most critical editor, vital information can be obfuscated.Have a calm attitude and a clear head. Like a captain sailing a ship, know the most effective route between thought A and thought B, stick to the route, and end the voyage to applause.Dont interrupt others. This is really most applicable if youre part of a panel discussion, but is equally applicable during QA. There is no better way to tune people out than to cut them off.Great speakers are born, but most of them have to learn on the job, and there is no shame in that.Using the right communication techniques really helps. Most people who are obliged to speak in meetings or at leadership retreats either have never been sh own these techniques, or have never taken the time to practice them.The best news is that these techniques are easy to remember, to learn and to master. Even better they work in all situations, from large formal speeches to casual information sessions and even social occasions.Author BioPatrick Alain is the author of The Managers Phrase Book. He is an internationally known developer of some of the worlds best-selling video games, including the multi-awarded blockbusters Grand Theft Auto and Red Dead Redemption. Alains first publishing venture, The Leader Phrase Book, was immediately successful. He was born in Paris, France, and has lived in a number of countries. Fluent in five languages, he attributes much of his success to his ability to be a vital participant in large, multilingual teams. Alain holds a masters degree from the University of Paris and has lived in San Diego, California since 2004.Make meaningful contactCommunication is vital in an organization, and it starts from the top on down. Good communication goes beyond knowing when to rely on email and when to have in-person conversationsits also about knowing how to educate others, resolve conflict, and set expectations, which are crucial for you as a leader. Could you use some help getting better at all of that?Sign up for exclusive https//www.youtube.com/ adviceand well send you the latestmanagement strategies,recruiting tips, hiring trends, and even some awesome deals. The better you can communicate, the more smoothly workdays will beand that will make everyones job more pleasant.